Leg cramps hurt, but they tend to pass. More permanent: losing your teeth to a hockey puck. The Miami Heat player was hobbled by cramps in Game Four of the NBA Finals Tuesday night. Since hating on Lebron James is a more popular national pastime than the four major sports combined, he became the target for several NHL players who…well, frankly, we expected better burns than these, guys. As comedians, you make great hockey players.
Read on to see what they said. more
“Yea-uhhh *grunt* Urgh! Beeehhhzzbaalll *moan*”
There’s a strange relationship between sports and music. When music is used in support of sports (like that “Na na na na hey” song), it goes together like Nutella and literally anything else in the world. But when a foolhardy rock star decides to pay a direct tribute to his or her hometown heroes, the results are decidedly…awkward.
It’s an odd relationship to consider, especially since there are some terrific artists writing songs about legendary teams. Problem is, more often than not they usually come off less like an earnest tribute and more like a forced family photo. So, for your benefit, we’ve combed through all those cringe-worthy songs and reviewed some of our “favorites.” Enjoy.
(Note: these songs are specifically by an artist, for a team. No regular team anthems like “Brass Bonanza.”)more
This could easily be 1948
By now you’re probably hitting the first wall of fantasy league fatigue. Never fear! We have a guide to preserving your sanity…as much as any man sitting at his basement computer memorizing statistics about a fictional team can be considered sane.more
Irwin, La Broad, & Pudlin / Wikipedia
Professional athletes are the pinnacle of human physicality. They spend tireless hours in the gym, perfecting their bodies to push their physical limits, all so we can feel entertained while we chug another beer. Athletes have the bodies that we wish we had. At least, most athletes do. Occasionally, a professional sports human (I find it hard to always use the word athlete to describe them) will hobble along and capture our attention. Perhaps it’s exceptional skill, immaculate accuracy, or complete blind luck; unfit athletes have a certain spell over us all. A gravy covered, one more soda spell. Who are the most successful, least athletic athletes in the history of athletics? Let’s take a look.
When Congress has more capable players than your basketball team, something is truly wrong
I was born in Washington D.C., I spent my childhood there, and there are many things to recommend about our nation’s capital. The monuments, the free museums, the cherry trees, and if there’s a sports game, in any form, running that day, you’ll be able to get tickets for twenty bucks, because the teams all blow.
Well, they did blow, anyway. Lately something strange has been happening.more
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